Her beauty and kindness is magnificent, her smiles light up the world. Her arms bring warmth and so much love. Her touch gives comfort to those in pain. But her pain is deep within, her burdens are behind those lively, bubbly and lovely features.
Every night she is praying that her battle will soon be over. Wishing that somebody will hopefully wake her up from her draining nightmares. Everyday is a stir of hell for her. She really wanted to scream in pain. She is without a doubt in emotional distress but too incapable of helping herself and showing the world her volnerability.
She looks upon salvation, she wanted to leave but so scared, afraid that she might not be able to stand with that decision. She is too in love, he is her all, her happiness, he is her shelter, he is the man of her dreams, the father of her children, her first love. Regardless of her reasons of staying in the relationship, no amount of violence is acceptable. She’s been in pain. She’s been at her lowest self. She can hardly figure out her worth. She has forgotten her value and self-respect. For her worth is beaten by violence and anguish. She is trapped with the process and she’s bearing it all. She isn’t sure until when she could stay and play all the game of shaming, hiting, spiritual deprivations. Her misconception of love and herself put her in pain. Are you the same girl? Do the scenes ring a bell to you? Allow me to ask you these questions.
What makes you happy really in a relationship? What does love and loving means to you? What kind of life do you perceive to have? Is mocking part of that dream? Is hitting part of your ideal relationship activities? Is crying to your sleep every night is your planned hobby?
I have met a lot of women who stayed in their traumatic relationship because of the trap of unworthiness and dependency. They were more than willing to give up everything for the other.
It all start from meeting, then dating and setting in a relationship. Its starts from small signs, not long after labeling the dating, he started mocking you, yelling at you, asking you to do the things you never wanted to do. But, you still fight for the love you believe the best and you deserve. You just closed your eyes every time and still think that it’s part of the process of being in a relationship. Worst, you even brand it as selfless love or commitment.
You remain hopeful that one day he will change and value you, love you commensurate to the love you are giving him, for you have sacrificed a lot. Of course you are the super woman to him. No, please! Those were never true! How long will you bear every abusive act he’s showing and doing? Until you get used with the process?
You think that it’s fine to experience slap ones in a while, its okay to get kicked and punched because he loves you, he wanted you to be better. It was all your fault, because you lacked on this part and that., don’t do good as a wife, too fat, ugly, boring etc.
Lady whatever statement that comes from his mouth is not you. Its all about him and his wounded soul. When will you start drawing the line for you? When are you going to figure out that very meaning of 1 Corinthians 13:4. Jesus himself gave us a crystal clear definition of love, and why now? You are bearing it all!
You have lost sight of who you are, and you choose to live broken and insignificant. Start all over again, be strong and bold enough to free yourself from the bondage of an abusive relationship. Find the courage to live the life you really want and go after it.
Remember that God created you precious and you are gift to the world. Go back home now to who you really are. Let go of the punishment of idolatry and start loving, loving yourself. Unleash that transcendent life in you. Have faith, God will lead you to that relationship and love you truly deserve. Win back your stolen worth. Its all that matters. May you live well.
All my love,